Edward the Awful
Surf'thulhu's loser cousin comes to visit

Fri, 18 Dec, 2009
Lee Thompson-Herbert


I'm going through back entries that never actually made it online. This one came from my paper journal (there are a bunch that never even made it to electronic format, much less online):

You have to wonder about my head. This is another entry about one of my weird dreams. I can't even claim that they're drug-fueled, since I've had these types of dreams for as long as I can remember. Certainly long before the doctors started loading up all the lupus medications.

I've previously written about Surf'thulhu, the Elder God of Surf. Apparently, there's also an Elder God of Footie (Soccer) Hooligans: Edward the Awful. Awful Ed is actually the tribal god of all extreme sports fans, so he also rules the American football fans Raider Nation, the various hockey fanatics, and all the folks you see on televised games covered in body paints in Their Team's colors or their team's logo shaved into their hair. The type of sports fans who if they were music fans would be Dead Heads -- real ones, the ones who give up their jobs and follow the band/team around until the season is over. Fanatics.

Scholars debate whether Awful Ed's priests intentionally cause riots in order to suck up the energy caused and use that to summon Awful Ed, or if the presence of a large group of fans in the correct setting summons Awful Ed by itself and then the horror of His presence causes mass insanity and riots. Either way, Wherever Edward the Awful goes, riots and destruction follow in his path, mostly caused by drunken idiots who later have no idea what happened.

So when I started telling George about the dream, I mentioned Awful Ed, and George immediately said, "Surf'thulhu?" I hadn't even gotten that far yet, and he understood. This is why we're married, we have complimentary insanities. He now wants me to do a "Hang Six" tshirt for Surf'thulhu.

Hang Six Logo draft

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